Identity Loss in Motherhood

Virtual Support for New York Moms

“I barely recognize myself anymore…”

Becoming a mother is one of the most pivotal transitions in a woman’s life. If you’re feeling like a stranger in your own skin - like you barely know who you are outside of motherhood - you are among the majority of women who struggle with identity loss related to motherhood.

I’m here to help. Working with a Maternal Mental Health Specialist can provide you the guided insight and support you need to rediscover who you are; both as a mother, and as an individual.

Throughout a woman’s life, she will experience an immeasurable amount of change. None more drastic, however, than during the postpartum period.

For many of us, we’ve been conditioned to believe that our worth is directly tied to our appearances and how productive we are (especially at home.) In the months immediately following birth, your body feels broken - like it’s been hit by a car. You struggle to walk for days, let alone get many tasks done around the house, and you might feel like your sole contribution is to feed, burp, and change this tiny little human. (And that’s if your birth was uneventful.)

Following that period, you’ve spent so much time focusing only on the tasks of a new mother, that you may struggle to even identify parts of yourself that existed prior to giving birth. Your days blur, your body eventually heals, but you’ve spent so much time existing in this bubble - away from friends and colleagues, that you’re pretty sure this is your only purpose now.

So many women have told me that after having kids, it’s like they have lost all sight of who they once were, and merely exist in this tiny world at home; baby on their hip, singing Miss Rachel songs.

You may be feeling like the girl you once were is long gone. All your hobbies and interests have slowly faded away, and when you look in the mirror you can only see remnants of the person who used to be looking back at you.

She’s still in there - and I can help you find her.

You are a mother. But that’s not all that you are.

You want to reconnect with yourself but you feel guilty taking time away from the kids. You want to rediscover the things that once made you feel alive. You want to shift into this new identity as a mom, while keeping that authenticity of who you were “in a past life.”

I know it. I’ve lived it. And I’m here to help you do it.

I’ve helped dozens of women, just like you, struggling to intertwine who they once were, with who they now are. It was possible for them, and it’s possible for you, too.

Meet Alex Quinn

Licensed Clinical Social Worker (092864)

I’m a mom of 2 and a Maternal Mental Health Specialist with over 9 years of experience in the field. After graduating from NYU with a Masters in Advanced Clinical Social Work, I knew that being a clinician was truly my calling, but it wasn’t until a handful of years later that I understood the exact work that my heart felt drawn to.

In 2020, I gave birth to my first daughter and battled with postpartum depression and anxiety. With the help of a specialist, I clawed my way through those early days of motherhood, and knew from that point on, these were the women I wanted to dedicate my career to; the ones just like me, who loved their baby but felt crushed by the experience of motherhood.

I know that the days seem dark and long now as you move through the adjustments to this new life, but I am here to bring you comfort and hope that there are brighter days ahead. As moms, we are so conditioned to “do it all” and not ask for help, but I am here to tell you that doing so is the best decision I ever made for myself and for my kids. And it could be the same for you. Don’t do it alone. I’m here to support you.

A young woman with long wavy brown hair, smiling with crossed arms, wearing a black long-sleeve shirt, posing against a neutral gray background.

Image was edited using AI

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